Guest Review: Inheritance by Christopher Paolini

I’ve asked Khaalidah Muhammad-Ali to guest review today because I read her review on Goodreads and it was excellent. I haven’t had the energy to attack this book yet but feel compelled to even if it isn’t what the others were.

Paolini’s Inheritance is the Definition of Verbosity by Khaalidah Muhammad-Ali

Intrigued by the fact that a fifteen year old managed to successfully write and publish an epic fantasy novel, I’ve followed the Inheritance Cycle from the beginning.  I’ve stayed with the series because I really liked the story and cared about the characters and their prospective fates.  With that said, Inheritance was a disappointment on such a grand scale, that days after completing the book, I am still reeling.

Allow me to digress a moment.  The Inheritance Cycle was supposed to be the Inheritance Trilogy.  In other words, Brisingr, the third book in this series was supposed to be the last.  I realized about halfway through that there was no way for Paolini to wrap up the entire series in the next three hundred pages, but I hoped nonetheless.  Despite the disappointment of having to wait for the next installment to see the lives of these characters resolved, I was willing. This should have been my first clue, however, that Paolini was spreading this story too thin.

Fast forward three years.  Here, I want to say how thankful I am for my iPod, because if I had to actually sit in one place in order to read this monstrous tome, I’d have given up less than a quarter of the way through.  I assert that I still believe that the central story, that of Eragon, the boy who finds a dragon and who must save his people, is still a good one.  The problem with Inheritance lies in the fact that this central story gets lost in a morass of mundane side stories, repetitious ruminations, and tons of other inane drivel.  Inheritance’s verbosity is unparalleled by any book I have ever read before this, so much so, that I was very near tears on several occasions. Initially, I attributed it to the style of writing as the other three books in this series were also wordy, but this was in a whole new class. I eventually started skipping entire sections, then chapters of the book in search of action and dialogue.  Despite liberal skipping, estimated to be about half the book, there was never a point at which I felt that I’d lost my way.

I frequently found myself internally editing the prose and combining heavy sentences.  Some scenes, many scenes, did absolutely nothing to progress the story, and in fact often left me frustrated because I felt they were a colossal waste of time.  Even more aggravating however was Paolini’s complete and total neglect of those characters that should have received more of the spotlight in favor of those who weren’t germane to the story.

Worst of all the unnecessary side stories was the one including Hope, a child born with a cleft lip.  Endless pages are spent telling how Eragon learns of the labor, attends the birth, learns of the child’s disability, agrees to heal her, and then does so.  This was an absolutely useless waste of paper and ink.

Roran, Eragon’s cousin, is a prime example of a character that should have featured far less.  After his last adventure in Brisingr, where he had to save his pregnant girlfriend from the Ra’zac, his part in the tale really should have faded into the background.  Instead, Roran is resurrected time and again in battle scene after battle scene all of which, had they been omitted would have helped to render a clear well paced story.

Two characters who were sorely neglected are Murtagh, Eragon’s half-brother and nemesis and Nasuada, Eragon’s liege lord, a young woman of color (a rarity in fantasy), who’d inherited leadership of a nation of people at war.

Murtagh’s history is quite divergent from Eragon’s.  He grew up abused and despised under Galbatorix’s evil tutelage and forced by magic to commit abominable acts.  When he learns of Eragon, his half brother, and his favored life he still maintains a thread of goodness.  It is my opinion that Murtagh is actually the strongest character in this book.  Murtagh had far more personal depth, an intriguing history, and larger obstacles to overcome.  Not only did Murtagh overcome these obstacles, but in doing so showed the most personal growth of any character in this series.  What do we get of him in the end?  Nothing.  No resolution.  At most it can be said that he rode off into the sunset never to be heard from again.  In a word, crap.

Nasuada was also an interesting character.  At only nineteen or twenty she took up the role of leader of the Varden when her father died.  She was charged with rallying the many races of Alagaesia.  It is her leadership and guidance that leads them to success.  Her role in this book is also a bit understated as is her relationship with Murtagh.

I won’t drag this review on forever, as Paolini did with Inheritance, so I’ll try to balance the gist of this review on the head of a pin.  It really all comes down to editing.  I asked aloud several times while listening to this book, “Who edited this?”  As a writer, I know how difficult it can be to pare down a manuscript.  We love the words and we don’t want to lose them.  That’s where a good editor comes in, the person who is honest and brutal.  This 849 page monstrosity could have been wrapped up in half the number of pages without losing a single important element.

I suppose that I could have stopped reading when I realized that it was going badly. I really did feel compelled to keep going though, and that’s not me being tenacious.  I liked this story and had faith that I would be rewarded for my patience with the fourth book.  I had hopes until the very last scene that this tale would turn around.  It didn’t.  I just feel cheated.

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Khaalidah Muhammad-Ali is an indie-author of a novel entitled An Unproductive Woman available on Smashwords and Amazon.  She can be found online at www.khaalidah.com.  You can also follow her on twitter @khaalidah.